So maybe you have heard of this thing called Tantra. Maybe you have come along to one of my courses or events, or experienced Tantra in other ways.
I wanted to talk about in this article the difference I see between Tantra and being Tantric. Aren’t they the same thing?
For me if I look at this thing called Tantra it can feel external to who I am. Something that I can access now and again. Take it off the shelf, dust it off, maybe go to an evening, or, maybe experience a Tantric Massage. That’s all good and helps you to continue in growth but underneath this is the concept of being Tantric.
What is Tantric?
Well there are many descriptions that talk about the Tantric buzz words ‘ecstatic’, ‘orgasmic’ or in states of ‘bliss’. Quite simply being ‘Tantric’ is about being in love with life. Being in love with yourself, with others and with the world around you in every moment. And that when you have achieved this state of being in love all the time, then this opens the doorway to ‘ecstatic’ and ‘orgasmic’ states not just in sexual activity but in every single moment of every single day. Doing the daily chores, like putting the washing on, or, going shopping feels like a whole new experience. It’s like being a child discovering a whole new activity for the very first time even though in your life time you will have done these chores thousands of times. Some Tantrics talk about increasing in awareness, in having awareness in every moment that we do something. How often is it that when we are doing something that we don’t particularly like to do, we us techniques that deflect us away from the actual task at hand? This can mean that we then do things without thinking or more importantly without feeling them because we have allowed our minds to wander to other topics and therefore missed that “being in the moment”. In that experience we then lose a connection with what is around us and the mind continues to control and dictate our experience of things. Sometimes I have heard the notion that the mind lives in the past only. Shaping our experiences on past events only.
Very often when course particpants have come onto a course, they say that a feeling of “bliss” stays with them for many days and weeks afterwards. That they see their day to day life with new glasses on, with new perspectives. Why is that? Well in those course days much effort and emphasis is put into becoming more intimate with everything around you. It is about being in true deep intimate contact with other people but more importantly being in true deep intimate contact with yourself. In being inside yourself and staying present with what is going on for you in that moment.
At the end of a course I will always warn course particpants that they have been through a deep process and to take care of themselves when they enter back into the outside world. Because they have spent a number of days being in deep contact with themselves and with others and at the moment our day to day world does not always operate in that way. Again quite often course particpants will say that throughout a course when they have re-experienced the outside world they notice much more. They notice more readily those that are willing to connect in intimate contact (not sexual) but sometimes just in the way they have been served in a shop. They notice how the person made real contact with the eyes with them and that exchange of energy and love, just in the process of buying a newspaper. I often say that Tantra can quite literally change your life. I don’t mean that all the day to day problems in life are going to disappear or that suddenly you will win the lottery and live in a tropical island in the Caribbean (although that would be nice), but instead that the perspective that we have on life changes with Tantra. The way they we approach things, the way that we handle situations, the way we are with people.
All sounds quite easy? Right! I know that for myself before Tantra say for example someone was angry with me, I would retaliate back with the anger straight away. Whereas nowadays I tend to take a step back. I try to see beyond the anger of that person. What is it they are really saying? What is it that they are really communicating? Anger can sometimes be the flight or fright option to fear. That anger can come up when there is fear. If you have ever read the books “conversations with god” Neal Donald Walsch says there are in truth only 2 emotions love and fear. The root of anger can be fear. Believe me, I wish every moment I could be like that, in my “Tantric state”. But, this might surprise you, I am human to and often mess it up, make mistakes, think afterwards “wish I had handled that one differently”. But is that what makes us human? Continuous learning, reflection, and continuing to observe ourselves and how we operate and exploring and meditating on different ways that we might handle the same issue or problem in the future.
Some Tantric’s say about “being in the moment”, not living in the past or the future and whilst I agree with this notion, if without awareness and reflection, how can you expect to “be in the moment” without any reflection on past situations.
Tantra for me is a lifestyle, a way of being. It worships your sexual and spiritual energy as a gateway to your enlightenment. But why sexual energy? For me, our sexual energy is one of the most powerful energies that we have as human beings. It is one of the strongest physical reactions, emotional reactions and in the moment of sex and being in our sexual energy our brain has to lose control. In sex we can’t think too much because we are too busy being in that moment, responding to the pleasure. Tantra offers that it is this pleasure, that moment at orgasm/ejaculation that we are our true selves. This is why some of the Tantric Massages focus on expanding that period into extended periods of being orgasmic. The idea being that you can extend it so much that it becomes you, that it is the way to become in love with every moment in your life.
The reason that I teach Tantric Courses and Events isn’t just because I just love to show people these possibilities in Tantra, but that what is experienced in a 2 day course can be carried forward into your everyday life. That course particpants can take what they have experienced in 2 days or 4 days and take it forward into their l ife. There are many pathways to becoming enlightened, some people choose a Yogic pathway, others different forms of meditation. What I love about Tantra is that for me it is the super highway, the quickest way to blast through our “stuff” that can take people into those states of feeling “ecstatic” and “blissful”.
However, a course, in my experience, just isn’t enough. There is something for me about continued practice, making Tantra part of an everyday part of life. That’s why earlier this year I set up our Online Community and offer frequent regular Tantric practices, and also why I write this blog, to help make the bridge to being a Tantric. Of course there are times in life when it just isn’t that simple, but then as we know, the more that we do something, the more it becomes normal. Take driving lessons, when I first sat behind the wheel of a car, I was so puzzled as to how on earth I was going to operate this thing. Nowadays I get in the car and my actions are automatic. Maybe being “Tantric” can be automatic too offering you a blissful, colourful, ecstatic and beautiful life?
Love Jason xxx
